36. Indian Summer and 37. Summer's Almost Gone

The Doors were the band of my middle school and high school years.   I was around the age of my oldest when I found the Doors and they soundtracked many good times over that monumental period of our lives where we start to become our adult selves. The years of trial and many errors where we hopefully find the right path.  Those were the years when there was no hint of responsibility and anything was possible. They were a nice soundtrack for those of us teenage rebels that needed to escape the "harsh reality" of our middle America middle class lives.

I listened to Morrison Hotel constantly on my parent's turntable and loved Indian Summer as it had that hint of melancholy that I love in a song. Plus, as a teenager that ode to summer love always seemed to soundtrack the latest crush.  It also had a beautiful Robbie Krieger guitar solo that almost said more than Morrison's lyrics.  I also made a point  to listen to Summer's Almost Gone because every August it would eulogize the passing of another year.   Somewhere along the way I kind of outgrew the band. The false promises of nihilistic freedom were overshadowed by the reality that every year brings more and more responsibilities.  Every year brought more and more things that encroached on that freedom. Nevertheless, when I hear these songs I am brought back to the melancholy last days of summer where we mourned the passing of the season like it were the loss of a friend.  Sitting at the house of a friend lamenting the end of summer. Sitting with friends before we went off to college promising we would always be that close.  Graduating college and making an effort to get together every so often, then not so often, then shooting a text every so often..... and here we are. 

It's late. Smoke swirls in the humid night air. Cicadas and mosquitoes buzz. The sweet smell of wood smoke fills my senses. The sun has set on another summer.   Another year gone. This summer has gone faster than any other that I can recall. My oldest is about 6 summers or so from potentially being at college, and as a kid 6 summers feels like an eternity, but as an adult I swear to God I have had meetings at work that last 6 seasons. 

Time continues to pass. It was a great summer filled with watching my girls play softball and laugh with their friends. Vacations and family time. Late nights and sleeping in. Watching the kids as they sit unaware of how they will miss these times. These days where they are bored and can't wait to get older.  These days where they wake with the full belief that anything is possible and live as if there is nothing but today. The freedom of youth. The beauty of that time that is unfortunately so fleeting. I unapologetically live vicariously through their summers because as an adult we have no summer, they are our summer.  Our kids and their joy is our summer. Our break from responsibility. They have the hope and the ignorance of what growing up really means.  We have meetings, deadlines, goals,  targets, slide decks, analysis, roundtables, networking, meetings, reality, and the like. 

Tomorrow we will collectively begin the next chapter. Another school year.   Fall will come, the cold winter will usher in holiday cheer, spring will come and we will feel renewed. Summer will come again and pass, this time even quicker than before. We will say we will do everything possible to take it all in, but responsibility will find us calmly unaware of how fast it will pass. Another year will be gone and when next summer is gone where will we be?